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Rocks In My Head

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things not to say to the sole proprietor of a rock shop


Some day, when I have time, I’m going to take up a fun hobby like this.  Maybe after I retire.

Allow me to throw a bucket of cold water on your  life too.


Do you polish your own rocks or do you just buy and resell?

I have all the equipment to do the processes  but there wouldn’t be enough hours in a day to create this much inventory.  Not that it’s any of your  business.


Do you find all of these rocks around here?

Sure.  We live in an area that abounds in precious metal ores, azurite and malachite, aquarmarine, rubies, emeralds.  Just dig right in.


I should stop in and take a look at your rocks.

I’ve been here for decades.  Why bother now?


I’m bringing the kids over to look at rocks.  Kids just LOVE rocks.

This isn’t a toy store.


Do you have a rock polisher?

Yes  I’ve got an all-in-one machine that tumbles, makes cabochons, facets and does the whole operation.  You just press a few buttons and let ‘er rip.


Are these rocks basically what was left over from your grandfather’s business?

Are you a rude SOB who never learned any manners?


What is this specimen?

It’s an ugly gray rock.  Why do you want to know?


Do you buy rocks?

Leave your number.  If I want your damn rocks, I’ll call you.


My uncle used to polish rocks.

Bless him.


Where do you get all these rocks?

I pick them off from trees.


Have you been to Duluth?  They have a nice BIG rock shop over there.

F*** you.



Posted by oh5/ojhoff at 7:16 PM CDT
Updated: 06/14/12 7:21 PM CDT
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